Saturday, December 17, 2011

An Encounter in the Woods

Just thought that I'd pop into the blogosphere again for what's quickly turning into a semi-monthly posting schedule. Perhaps my inactivity explains why the number of followers has dropped a couple since my last post. Perhaps that svelte picture of me in my last post offended a couple of people? Too much butt-crack perchance? Hopefully nobody thought that was really ME!

My back pain persists but at least I'm staying away from the hospital. A couple of weeks ago the dog was lying on the floor of my office...looking at me with sad, bloodshot eyes. He has been ailing as well of late. Perhaps some sympathy pains from man's best friend?

I figured that a mid-day walk would be good medicine for us both. It was a bit chilly so I threw the lined coat on our greyhound and leashed him up. As we left the house, Jake the Shih Tzu spied us from the house across the road. He stood on the back of the living room sofa and I'm sure was imagining a big, tasty rat as he vigourously shook his stuffed toy.

We walked down the gravel path into the urban woods, breathing the fresh air and stretching our limbs. Jet eventually forced me to use a poopy bag. Thankfully only one (anyone who's owned a large breed dog knows that a dumpster is a requirement in the back yard). A beagle darted towards us. It had a collar with tags but there was no owner in sight. As it neared its hind end dropped and its tail curled between its hind legs. I tried to lure it towards me but it ran off the path into the stunted pine trees. (On a side my former life as a 'Dog Catcher' only one type of dog ever tried to bite me...a beagle).

A young man came along the path. He looked a bit cold as he wasn't wearing a jacket. He stooped as he grasped the collar of a shepherd-ish looking dog. He explained that the dogs escaped the house when he had the door open. The lived at the end of a nearby busy street. I couldn't loan him my leash as my dog would no doubt run away. With my back in its present state, I was deduced to running the 100 yard dash in over 12 seconds and knew there was no way I would be able to catch the sprinting greyhound.

He explained that the beagle was his step-father's hunting dog. She was normally kept in a pen (Boo!) and naturally ran to the woods after the 'great escape'. He tried carrying the beagle in one arm as he stooped to grasp the collar of the other dog. The beagle squirmed too much so he put her down on the gravel path.

I told him that perhaps he should lead the dog he had home and I would keep the beagle following me in the woods until his return. "Good plan, dude!" he said.

Unfortunately the beagle spied a woman jogging along the nearby busy street and chased after her. "Bella," the young man bellowed after the fleeing beast. The scene in the faux forest had become a bit too surrealistic for my liking. I knew we were only a few sleek bodies and sparkles away from being in a bad Hollywood blockbuster (apologies to Stephenie Meyer).

To make a long story short, the young man soon returned with a leash and Bella the beagle grew tired of chasing the jogger and returned to the woods in search of more challenging game. She hung about Jet and I until she was secured on the leash and returned to her life of drudgery.

The End


Cathy Olliffe-Webster said...

I think you should have stolen the beagle and brought him home and gave him a proper life. Poor beagley-boo! He could have slothed around the living room with Jet, and munched on your hands for snacks and eaten all of V's purses, all while looking completely adorable!

Good to see you back, even if it is only bi-monthly.

(You can tell people you're bi now! I wonder what the Shih Tzu would think of that?)

Laurita said...

I see the fresh air did you good. I think we all need to escape now and then and run wild and free into the woods, darting hither and yon through the flora. Ahhh.

I'm glad you didn't get lost.

Katey said...

It weirds me out that people still use kennels and pens. I know it's the traditional way to keep your hunting hounds but... wtf. Are we fox hunting or something?

Sounds surreal indeed. Sending get well vibes for the back!

Alan W. Davidson said...

Cathy- Hey, keep that 'Bi-' thing to yourself...and I hate beagles. As noted, I've got a bad history with that breed.

Laurita- Somehow, I don't see myself running hither and yon. Just not a hither and yon kinda guy I guess. But the fresh air is nice...

Katey- Yeah, I've worked in a couple of kennels and have seen the toll that long-term penning takes on dogs. Pretty sad. And thanks for the 'get well' vibes, dude.