Bad Movie Night (Part 3)

Earlier in the week, I was going to post a recap of the Oscars and the annual friendly competition between 'V' and myself to pick the most winners. But then a day passed. And then another. It's now what I would consider 'old news' as I'm sure you've all heard that "The King's Speech" was the big winner (deservedly so). GLOATING ALERT...I'll just say that my losing streak is finally over and I have finally out-scored the competition. 'V' usually beats me by one or two picks. However, this time I had an impressive 15 out of 18 correct. The categories I got wrong, you might ask? I had picked True Grit for cinematography, but "Inception" won. I figured Geoffrey Rush would be part of "The King's Speech" steam roll. Didn't happen. Christian Bale won his first Oscar for playing the trainer in "The Fighter".  I also assumed the lovely, and somewhat eccentric, Helena Bonham Carter would win for "The King's Speech". Nope. The Oscar went to the potty-mouthed Melissa Leo in "The Fighter".

Prof. Larry called for another Bad Movie Night^TM with only 48 hours notice. We rallied together a skeleton crew of four brave souls and assembled in his basement for another nudie movie  cinematic experience. After 45 minutes to choose the 82 minute movie, we settled on on the 1976 stunner "Seven Women for Satan" (Les week-ends maléfiques du Comte Zaroff). This "banned in France" erotic Euro-horror was written, directed by, and starred Michel Lemoine.

The main character lives in a French chateau and his name is Count Zaroff (I think he is supposed to be the nephew of Zaroff, the guy who hunted men on a deserted island in the movie "The Most Dangerous Game" (1932). I suppose Lemoine intended his movie to be an homage to that movie. The saying, "with friends like that, who needs enemies" comes to mind. The Compte is aided by man-servant, philosophical/spiritual advisor, and body removal guy Karl (played by Swiss horror veteran Howard Vernon). Also in residence are the ghost of a woman that his ancestor murdered and a Great Dane called Ingmar. The fashionably-dressed ghost pops up on occasion to torment the Compte, spoiling Karl's attempts to make him a murderous fiend like his uncle.

Don't get  me wrong. The Compte murders several women in what appears to be a hallucinogenic rage. He chases them on horseback, in cars and on foot. He's a bad dude that seems to drift between periods of reality and erotic fantasy. Karl's main reason for being there is to provide us with lengthy back story...and, of course, to lure in the occasional hapless female victim into the chateau. I think the dog is there for comedic relief because she certainly isn't very scary. There is a priceless scene where the dog is sent chasing after a woman trying to escape wearing only a blue feather boa (the woman wears the boa, not the dog...). The dog jumps on her in what is meant as a vicious attack. It really looks like the dog is playing and the victim is trying to hold her in place by her collar. Perhaps they smeared the woman's assests with steak sauce to get the dog interested.

Some of the scenes are quite stylishly shot from peculiar angles and with a reasonably good soundtrack. That being said, there was one tune played to death each time the Compte chased after a woman. The story line was difficult to follow (most of what I note here I gleaned from people commenting about the movie at IMDB.com. One zealot commented on a scene where one of the hapless victims is drugged and is dancing lewdly in front of a wooded carving of a black man. The totem, at one point, comes alive and its hands roam across the woman's...well, you get the picture. Anyway, the guy said, "...represents the dark unconscious mind of a white woman's unrestrained sexual drive."  Yeah. Right.

The most hilarious aspect of the film was that it was both subtitled AND dubbed in English. As a result, a lot of the dialogue didn't match the text written on the screen and, in fact, was completely different with comedic results. As per usual, I'm not going to recommend this film. Remember…it was Bad Movie Night^TM, not Oscar Winners of the 20^th Century Night. There was one memorable scene with a young couple asking to see the former 'torture chamber' in the dungeon (yeah, for real...they ASKED to see it). I won't spoil it with the details, but suffice it to say they come to a bad end. There was no swearing in the film and even the murder scenes were tame by today's standards. However, the film was over the top in its depictions of violence against women. They were the target throughout the movie. For the most part they are naked and defenseless. Be forewarned if you plan on renting this dud.